I keep trying to instill in myself the Stoic advice of Marcus Aurelius, that what is outside my mind has no effect on my mind.
Marcus Aurelius’ “Meditations” was not the first text where I read that I should not worry about everything outside my mind because I cannot influence it anyhow. Indeed, it was in Seneca’s “Dialogues” that I read this marvelous idea for the first time. I read it in 2017. Marcus Aurelius’ lecture reminded me of what is crucial in one’s life. The only thing we can influence (but not 100%) is our mind, thoughts, and imagination. Still, even our thoughts can sometimes be out of our control (e.g., when impulses, not a logical reason, drive us to our behaviors). We cannot impact other’s thoughts. We can try to adjust and influence other people’s ideas. Still, we have minimal ability to do it.
Luckily, the same should go the opposite.
Similarly, we have limited abilities to affect other people’s thoughts; others should not impact our thoughts, feelings, and moods. Remember, my Dear Friend, it is you who decides how you feel and what you think, not the external world. Your mood does not depend on anything external except your internal thoughts. Other people’s thoughts and words cannot harm me anyhow. I cannot let these imaginary thoughts and external words influence me. I’ve already written a text stating that a physical attack is much worse than a verbal one.
When someone hits you, and you damage your head by beating the pavement, you can quickly die.
If someone insults you, it is you who decides how you will handle these words. After all, these are only words, voices of external beings who never were and never become you. I know it is pretty easy to write about all these things, and it is much harder to implement them into practice. Still, I try to do it each day, guided by the Stoic principle that what is outside my mind has no effect on my mind.
